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Post by Shmo(HeyBob) on Nov 3, 2003 1:12:48 GMT -5
This is what I call a mut story. A mix of two shows. Reviews would be apreciated, but if you review it would be helpful if you told me how to improve the story instead of just saying it was good or just plain yuck. You may not reach a Gilmore Part till Ch 2.
Chapter 1
"Now students." The teacher anounced as he passed out envelopes to each student. "Do you remember that test we took last week? Well. That test has been looked at by a prep school in Hartford. Why? You ask. Well they just-"
"Wait." Nathen interupted him "We live in North Carolina. What the heck is a Hartford school looking at our grades for?"
"I was about to explain. As I was saying before Mr. Scott's interuption....The prep school in Hartford has six openings and they are looking for people to fill them. Put your hand down Mr. Scott. Of course the students have to live in Hartford or near it if they're going to go to this school, but that's your problem. Now. Our school was chosen because of our senior's high grades.
"The teachers of the senior class got together and chose thirty students to have a chance at higher education."
A young looking black guy from the back asked "So what does all of this have to do with the envelopes?"
*To tired to write more.*
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Mut Fic
Nov 3, 2003 11:50:40 GMT -5
Post by DarkAngl2025 on Nov 3, 2003 11:50:40 GMT -5
ooh, an OTH/GG crossover, right? I'm excited!!! And so far so good, not much to actually review about, but I like where the story is going.
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Mut Fic
Nov 3, 2003 12:33:08 GMT -5
Post by Trory on Nov 3, 2003 12:33:08 GMT -5
Its not much..but its great!!
Love it!! ;D
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Mut Fic
Nov 3, 2003 19:25:09 GMT -5
Post by Shmo(HeyBob) on Nov 3, 2003 19:25:09 GMT -5
*More of chapter 1*
"Oh! Yes." The teacher recalling the envelopes."Those are the results of your tests and there is also a letter that tells you whether you'll be staying here or whether you'll be one of the luck thirty who get to take another test to become on of the lucky six."
The teacher looks around the room. His eyes stop on Nathen and he asked "Anymore questions Mr. Scott?"
"No" he responds.
Payton's POV
Who really gives a damn about changing schools anyway? I'd much rather change boyfriends. Having Nathen for a boyfriend sucks. He can be such an ass sometimes....His brother's not bad though.
These were the thought going through Payton's head when the bell rang, signalling freedome for some and cheerleading practice for others. Namely her.
Payton would have no time to open her envelope without being late for practice. And the truth was that she didn't really care about what her letter said. She knew what that school was going to be like and in her mind, it was going to be exactly the same as Tree Hill High.
There'd still be drinking and easy girls. Except for the fact that drugs could be more expensive and the houses would be bigger, there wouldn't be much of a difference.
Face it. Payton thought as she changed in the locker room Teenagers are the same no matter where you are.
Nathen's POV
Nathen walked into the kitchen and threw his envelope on the counter. He didn't even bother looking. He knew what it said. Nathen could imagine what the letter said perfectly.
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Scott,
We are unimaginably happy to inform you that your son was not accepted. His grades are to low, his citizenship is horrendous, etc. etc.
Why'd he care anyway? The preppies probably didn't even have a basketball team. As long as Nathen was good at basketball his life was gonna be good too.
Haley's POV
The trouble was that Haley had gotten her letter in first period. The excitment was killing her. Why had she decided to wait untill Luke got his?
Oh yeah thought Haley So we could open them together.
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Post by DarkAngl2025 on Nov 4, 2003 0:51:19 GMT -5
thanks for posting more! Okay just a suggestion, before you flip POV's maybe you should put something like Payton's POV then her little bit about Nathan and then when you get to Haley put Haley's POV...I mean I could tell who was who just by reading and knowing what each would think, but for those who are unfamiliar with the show (I mean this is a GG board after all) that might help a bit. Other than that it's great, I can't wait for more!!!!
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Mut Fic
Nov 5, 2003 20:46:37 GMT -5
Post by Shmo(HeyBob) on Nov 5, 2003 20:46:37 GMT -5
*O.K. So today I was letting this girl in my class read my fic and she dropped it and a cup fell on it and it was soaked with MountainBlast Poweraid. But I could still make out the words so here is what made it through. The Gilmore parts were hard to write though. Usually everytime it's a character change the time of day passes too. Sometimes you won't even notice it. And don't ask about Rory's skirt. And I have nothing against midgets.*
Luke's POV
When Luke walked into the cafe he saw Haley nervously bouncing on the balls of her feet.
"So you got your letter too huh?" He asked as he calmly made his way twords her "Did you get in or what?"
"Was that a joke?"Haley lashed out "I've been waiting till you got yours so we could open them together"
"O.K. then. Lets open them" Luke said, "I wouldn't want you to burn a hole through the floor."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Chapter 2~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Mom!" yelled Rory Gilmore "Have you seen my Chilton skirt?"
"Uh....The plaid one?" Lorelai asked nervously.
"No. The one with the dancing midgets on it." Rory replied sarcastically.
"Oh. That one huh?"
"Mom. What did you do with it?"
"Uh O.K. Yesterday while you were at school I had a thing going on where I thought I'd try to be more domestic and actually use actuall plates to eat. And then I reallized that after eating off an actuall plate that the plate would have to be washed."
"Where's my skirt mom?"
"O.K. Bottom line? I put the plate in the dishwasher and I put the soap in and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where the soap I was puting in went and-"
"Where's my skirt mom?"
"And the thing overflowed and I used your skirt to whipe up the mess." Lorelai said in a rush.
"What am I gonna wear to school today?!"
"Relax. I washed it so it wouldn't smell like Jet Dry."
"So where's my skirt?"
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Post by DarkAngl2025 on Nov 6, 2003 1:19:06 GMT -5
I have to say when I first read your bit about writing the GG part...and then I read Luke was in the diner...I thought Luke as in Scott Patterson Luke, not as in Chad Luke...it was kinda funny until I read a bit further and I was like "oh!" Other than that I'm still wondering where the skirt is...lol that Lorelai/Rory scene was quite funny and totally in character for both
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Mut Fic
Dec 6, 2003 22:14:27 GMT -5
Post by TheCharmedOne on Dec 6, 2003 22:14:27 GMT -5
Uhhmmm...im a bit lost.
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Mut Fic
Dec 7, 2003 14:31:02 GMT -5
Post by Shmo(HeyBob) on Dec 7, 2003 14:31:02 GMT -5
How can you be?
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Mut Fic
Dec 7, 2003 21:00:36 GMT -5
Post by TheCharmedOne on Dec 7, 2003 21:00:36 GMT -5
I unno...
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