ahhhhhhhh YAY!! hehe
thanx hannah, abz and susie
*does a victory dance* "I got my own noun, I got my own noun!" and hey i was being patient HAHAHA
oh this totally is not about that but heres more funny quotes haha
"A Lawyer will do anything to win a case, sometimes he will even tell the truth."
Patrick Murray.
"This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two."
George Burns.
"A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree."
Spike Milligan(where do u find trees on a boat....hmmm he must have a weird way of traveling)
"All are lunatics, but he who can analyse his delusions is called a philosopher"
Ambrose Bierce.
"Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff."
Steven Wright.
"I rob banks because that's where the money is."
Willie Sutton.
"Only one man ever understood me, and he didn't understand me."
G.W. Hegel (huh? hahaha)
"Sleep is an excellent way of listening to an opera."
James Stephens.
"To write a diary every day is like returning to one's own vomit."
Enoch Powell.
"You cannot have everything. I mean, where would you put it?"
Steven Wright.
"The trouble with children is that they're not returnable."
Quentin Crisp.
"Where there is no patrol car, there is no speed limit."
Peter Beckmann.
"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet."
Rodney Dangerfield.
"Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac."
George Carlin
"I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is, if they don't know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?"
Paul Merton.
"I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own."
Les Dawson.
"The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney..."
Steven Wright.
"We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture."
Robin Williams.
"If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?"
Steven Wright (AAAAAAHAHAHA I LOVE THAT HES SO FUNNY!!!)
"Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.' "
Charlie Brown.
"I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet."
Henry Youngman.
"Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time."
Steven Wright.
"My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more."
Walter Matthau.
"She got her looks from her father: He's a plastic surgeon."
Groucho Marx.
"No-one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish."
Kin Hubbard.
"I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge."
Spike Milligan.
A boy asks his father to use the car and the father replies "No, not until you cut your hair!".
The boy replies "But father...Jesus had long hair!"
To which his father says, "Yeah, but Jesus walked everywhere."(ahahaha these are funny but sorry this is too many haha) sorry
~~*NiCoLe*~~
